Luke 23:34 Father, Forgive them; for they know not what they do.
It was the dream, the self misidentification which lent forth the ignorance of each and every one who fills the story of what was once my painful childhood. It was my own dream and ignorance that kept me in bondage to it and held to suffering.
Only from here can I see that awakening to TRUTH was inevitable.
I was the 3rd born of 8 children, all close in age, not much over a year apart. It was my grandmother who received the call from my parents from a local bar asking her to take all us kids to the county courthouse and drop us off. They knew they were in a losing battle, after all, it was their negligence that resulted in my 5 year old sister being severely burned.
I was 4 years old at the time when my sister and oldest brother were out playing in the yard. Our father decided to burn a pile of debris that had been collected from the yard. After setting it ablaze, he returned to the house leaving us and the fire unattended. The 3 of us were running around the fire playing when my brother accidentally tripped our sister and as you might have guessed, she fell in. Scared and screaming, I ran for the house. She too was screaming and crying! Chaos had erupted!
I still have images of my sister sitting on the bathroom sink as our mother was splashing cold water on her blackened skin while the ambulance was en route. She had sustained burns to the right side of her cheek, her ear, down her neck, her chest and right arm.
What does a State Agency do with 6 children? They place them with anyone who will take them. Families in the 70’s were generally large and so placing 6 children in the same foster home would have been near impossible, we were all divided up. Myself and my sister who had sustained burns were placed together. Although she and I spent some time in foster care, a permanent placement was found.
My coming into this world born of alcoholic parents ignited an onset of unfathomable events, one by one, all contributing to the TRUTH burning through the veil of illusion.
“You are our little girls now, and no one can ever take you away”, he said, as we were traveling down the highway in his MGB. We were heading home after the court hearing which had declared us legally their children. I clung to those words as if they were the absolute truth; I had total faith in him. At first, life with this new family was just that, new and exciting. They loved us, they cherished us, and they treated us as if we were their own for the first 4 years and then something changed…To be continued:
The post titled “New Parents” coming soon.